How to handle your own Charlie Sheen

(EDITOR’S NOTE: This post was originally published on The Frontier at Grace on March 4, 2011.)

Over the past few weeks, Charlie Sheen has been all over the news.

From his reported drunken night in a hotel room to his bizarre interviews on The Today Show and 20/20, you can’t turn on the television without seeing Sheen and his issues.

It’s like a bad car wreck — you can’t turn away.

I’ve heard a lot of speculation on what people should do for Sheen. People have discussed how his family, his friends in Hollywood, and even CBS can help him.

I wonder what advice we would give if we had the opportunity to speak to him.

Not many of us will have the opportunity to speak to Sheen personally, but what about the Charlie Sheens in our personal lives? How do we help friends, co-workers, and family members who are engaging in self-destructive behavior?

It starts with something more simple than giving them advice: we pray for them. We pray for them consistently.

When we look at Sheen’s life and see the disastrous results of his actions, let’s remember to pray for the Charlie Sheens who are close to us. God can turn a bad car wreck into an inspiring recovery.

— Chris Pugh

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A familiar balancing act

The other day I overheard a husband and father mention that he hadn’t seen his children in two weeks. This gentleman has stated on multiple occasions how happy he is to “have a job in this economy.” I got the impression that this was his justification for working such long hours.

I wholeheartedly agree that those of us who are fortunate enough to have a steady job are truly blessed. However, when I heard this, a sense of sadness overtook me. I couldn’t help but immediately think about my own family and what it would be like if I shared this gentleman’s mindset. In my own mind, I had to ask the now-clichéd question, “What would Jesus do?”

For a man who is the main breadwinner for his family, finding work/family balance is critical. Colossians 3:23 says, “Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men” (NASB). So if I am following this verse and working for the Lord, therein lies my balance. If I am working for the Lord, then His Word takes priority in my life. If his Word is my priority, then His calling in my life is my priority. If His calling is my priority, and God has obviously called me to be a husband and father, then I have to trust that God will bless me and that I and my family will be OK even though I don’t sacrifice husband/father time for excessive time at work.

You might say, “But I have to work long hours in order to provide for my family.” My response would be, “Who are you working for?” and “Who are you trusting to provide?” For me, working very long hours says I’m working to provide for my family and trusting myself. If I work for God and trust Him to provide, then I get everything else thrown in, most importantly my family. Remember the words of Jesus: “Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you” (Matthew 6:33 NASB).

—Lou Barota

The economy made me do it

Some articles are helpful to read but turn your stomach.

That’s how I feel about this article on the link between economic difficulty and child abuse, which appeared in yesterday’s Dispatch. Child abuse in itself is a horrific reality of life. The notion that child abuse is getting worse as the economy gets worse—well, that is beyond sad.

The headline of the article, “More kids abused; economy to blame?” implies that the poor economy is the cause of child abuse. However, Rita Price, the author of the piece, was wise to include this insightful comment by Lara LaRoche, director of intake at Franklin County Children Services: “Poverty itself is not a cause of abuse or neglect. The correlation is the stresses that come with it.”

Circumstances never cause us to sin. Our sin is a result of the condition of our hearts, and the actions we take reveal the condition of our hearts. This is what Jesus meant when He said, “Out of the abundance of [a man’s] heart his mouth speaks” (Luke 6:45 ESV). Circumstances bring out what is inside a man; they do not put something in a man.

Financial difficulty just happens to be a powerfully revealing irritant. I’ve heard a number of people say that financial issues are the number one cause of divorce. It would be more accurate to say that financial issues are the number one revealer of the heart issues that cause divorce. Money has a unique way of exposing our competing allegiances and our latent selfishness.

Thus, in our continuing effort to get rid of excuses for ungodly behavior, we can now add this: the economy didn’t make you do it.

—Beau Stanley

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Crossing borders without a passport

I grew up on a relatively straightforward Midwestern diet, but over the years I have come to love foods from different cultures. Stacey and I both love Indian food, so it was really nice to join our new friend Jacob, who is from India, at an excellent Indian lunch buffet yesterday.

There are a number of lessons one could learn from such a lunch meeting. First, if you don’t like spices, don’t go to an Indian restaurant. Second, just because you can eat more, that doesn’t mean that you should eat more. Third, there is a great blessing in interacting with people who are from a different cultural background than you are from.

A person’s unique ethnic and geographic history is not accidental. Paul shared as much with the Athenian philosophers on Mars Hill: “And [God] made from one man every nation of mankind to live on all the face of the earth, having determined allotted periods and the boundaries of their dwelling place, that they should seek God, in the hope that they might feel their way toward him and find him” (Acts 17:26-27 ESV).  In other words, God determines when and where people live, and what their ethnicity is, so that some will come to know Him.

All of this leads to the conclusion that Christians should embrace people from other cultures, not shun them. Most of us following this blog live in the central Ohio area, and we have tremendous opportunities to practice this principle. Thousands of people living in central Ohio were not born in this country, but God Himself has determined that they would be here.

Let’s make the most of this divine relocation and share the love and message of Jesus with them.

—Beau Stanley

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Yes, trials have value

I was in the midst of a traffic Armageddon!

I live in the Huber Ridge development of Westerville. On Aug. 1, the intersection of State and Dempsey roads, which is a main entrance to the development for about 1,600 residents in the area, closed for repair for 30 days.

As a resident of the area, it was troubling.

My commute time to work and church increased, and it was a pain to say the least.

But I was able to get great advice from the local homeowners group, the Huber Ridge Area Association, and quickly found that my “trial” wasn’t that big of a deal.

Here’s the thing: we encounter little trials and big trials all the time in life. Even traffic detours test our faith in God’s goodness. And sometimes we forget that our trials of faith have value.

James wrote these encouraging words:

“Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing” (James 1:2-4 NLT).

Whatever your trial may be, small or large, it is an opportunity to grow in Christ.

—Chris Pugh

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(EDITOR’S NOTE—Photo: Chris Pugh)

Felix, Festus, and failure to comply

How many times this summer have we heard the phrases “failure to comply,”  “lack of institutional control,” or “failure to monitor”? Through all the headlines that have surrounded Ohio State football this summer, what became evident is that individuals failed to do the right thing. As much as I’d love to break down those issues from the perspective of a college football fan, I won’t bore you with my thoughts on the subject.

I’m sure you have noticed that we sometimes fail to do the right thing also. Those reasons could be fear of retribution. Fear we’ll be judged by others. Fear of not getting a promotion. Fear that doing the right thing could tarnish our reputations. Politicians may seek political gain through means that violate biblical principles. Athletes may take HGH to help them achieve fame and glory faster, even if that alters God’s creation. CEOs may fudge numbers or engage in fraudulent activity for financial gain.

In the Book of Acts, the Apostle Paul reminds us just how important it is for a Christian “to maintain always a blameless conscience both before God and before men” (Acts 24:16 NASB). The chapter in which this verse appears, and chapters 25 and 26 of Acts, illustrate how two individuals had the opportunity to do the right thing, but failed to do so.

The Jews brought Paul before Governor Felix based on charges that Paul was being a “pest” (24:5 NASB) and stirring up dissension. After Paul’s eloquent defense, Paul began to speak to Felix and his wife over the course of several days about faith in Christ. Felix became frightened and sent Paul away, saying he would call upon Paul when he found time. But Felix was not sparing Paul’s life by keeping him imprisoned, but rather hoping Paul would bribe Felix with money to obtain his release. He kept Paul at bay for two years hoping for a payoff!

Festus, who succeeded Felix, kept Paul in prison because he wanted to the do the Jews a favor and didn’t want to risk offending them. Once again, the Jews brought up serious charges against Paul.  Festus made the politically expedient choice to ask Paul to go to Jerusalem and be tried there. As a Roman citizen, Paul had the right to appeal to the emperor for a direct judgment, which he did.  According to Roman law, Festus had no choice but to obey the law. However, if Festus had not curried political favor, Paul could have been set free! Even King Agrippa, who arrived in Caesarea to pay his respects to Festus, acknowledged that Paul could have been set free, had he not appealed to Caesar.

As believers in Christ, Paul implores us to have a spotless conscience not only before God, but also before other men. In short, we are to show others that we are not afraid to do the right thing or speak what is right, no matter how unjustly we are treated by others, no matter the risk of losing worldly gain, such as political stature or money.

Men, do what’s right in the sight of the Lord and you will please Him. Christ died for us when He didn’t have to, yet he did so to free us from the bondage of sin in our lives. In other words, failure to comply is not an option.

—Kevin E. Davis

S&P upgrades Jesus

Yet another storm is unleashing itself on the financial markets. Some say that the storm pelting your portfolio today was caused by an S&P downgrade of U.S. debt securities from AAA to AA+ after markets closed on Friday. Maybe it’s more accurate to say that the storm is occurring because the U.S. has been on vacation for a couple of decades and now the credit card statement has come in the mail. Bad news, men. It’s a huge bill.

Admittedly, that is an oversimplification of a very challenging situation that we have discussed before on this blog. It can be discouraging to consider the magnitude of the fiscal problem that our country faces. But who wants to hear discouraging news on a Monday?

Here’s a bit of Monday encouragement: when times are difficult, Christianity sells better. S&P may have downgraded U.S. debt, but they have upgraded Jesus. People tend to be more receptive to the offer of salvation through Jesus when their illusion of self-sufficiency has been stripped away. And perhaps there is no better illusion-stripping compound than financial loss.

I certainly don’t pray that our government and the people of this country will suffer, but if we do suffer, don’t be surprised if some folks who couldn’t be bothered to talk about spiritual things are now a little more interested. I plan on being “prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks [me] for a reason for the hope that is in [me]” (1 Peter 3:15 ESV). Will you be prepared?

—Beau Stanley

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What Christians can learn from rock stars

I have been captivated in the last few days by a post on Mack Collier’s blog. In the post, Collier builds off a recent study undertaken by scientists at Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute. The study concludes that people in a group who fervently hold a minority belief will sway the majority if the fervent minority represents 10 percent of the group or higher.

This alone is worthy of our consideration. Yes, the study was strictly scientific and does not take into account the working of the Holy Spirit, which cannot be quantified scientifically. Nonetheless, the study shows that, excluding other factors, even a relatively small number of Christians in a group will exert a powerfully persuasive influence on the group if the Christians are unwavering in their faith and loyalty to Jesus.

What I am even more interested in, though, is Collier’s application of this study. For some time he has suggested that companies should market themselves not like companies do, but like rock stars do. Collier explains that companies tend to focus their marketing efforts on new customers, who are relatively large in number, but low in loyalty. In contrast, he says, rock stars focus their marketing efforts on brand advocates, who are relatively small in number, but high in loyalty. Collier believes the study by Rensselaer demonstrates what rock stars already know: a few passionate fans will “evangelize” and win over the majority (the word “evangelists” actually appears in the post and is a term used in the marketing world).

In other words, reach a few people deeply, and you will ultimately reach the masses. Does this sound familiar to any of you?

Our last Frontier Men’s Bible Study session covered The Master Plan of Evangelism, by Robert E. Coleman. One of Coleman’s main points in this book was this: Jesus’ strategy of mass evangelism was to concentrate his ministry on relatively few men who would, in turn, reach the masses as they multiplied their own disciples.

The implications for ministry are staggering. As Coleman suggests, our ministry priorities may be way off. It is very tempting to try to evangelize or minister to the masses directly, but this strategy all too often breeds superficiality and tends to be unsustainable. On the other hand, Rensselear Polytechnic Institute, Mack Collier, rock stars, Robert Coleman, and Jesus all agree—reach the few deeply, and you will eventually reach the many effectively.

And it was Jesus’ idea first.

—Beau Stanley

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Expect delays ahead

(EDITOR’S NOTE: This post originally appeared on Brian Elder’s blog on September 28, 2010.)

How many times have you been traveling down the highway, cruising right along, when you come across those dreaded “Expect Delays Ahead” signs? How have you responded? If you’re like me, you’ve probably expressed some version of “You have got to be kidding me!”

Why do we respond this way? Well, it could be that we just like to go fast and don’t want to have to slow down. It could be that we are running late (that’s usually my case) and are trying to make up for lost time. Or, it could be that we just do not like being inconvenienced. Maybe it’s because we can’t control the situation.

Whatever the reason, have we ever considered why there is a delay in the first place? Road repairs? Widening of the road? An overpass? Additional lanes? Whatever the reason, ultimately, these delays are for our own good. It most likely means that the improvement(s) being made will enable us to reach our destination in a more safe and efficient manner. Secondary benefits may include less wear and tear on our cars, less miles traveled, less stress, a more scenic trip . . .

As we travel down the highway of life, God will often place “Expect Delays Ahead” signs in our paths. They may come in the form of an illness, a lost job, a broken relationship, the loss of a loved one, etc. Whatever the form, I have learned and am still learning that ultimately these “delays” are for our own good. They are meant to draw us closer to our heavenly Father. They are meant to help us grow in our faith and obedience to Him. They are meant to help us get our priorities right. They are meant to help us make God-honoring decisions. God desires to have a personal relationship with each and every one of us. It is His desire that no one should perish but that all should have eternal life (see John 3:16).

Next time we come across an “Expect Delays Ahead” sign, let’s welcome it and embrace it because it ultimately is for our own good.

—Brian Elder

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What Bible translation should I use?

Welcome to our Wednesday “Ask Beau” post. The purpose of this weekly feature is to provide you, our readers, with biblical responses to questions you have about practical issues that you face.

As always, you may submit questions for future “Ask Beau” posts by contacting us at beau.stanley@gracebrethren.org or viewfromthepugh@yahoo.com, or by leaving a comment on this post.

Today’s question, “What Bible translation should I use?” unfortunately has no direct answer, since the question implies that one translation is better than the others in all instances—and that is not accurate. Most modern Bible translations do a very adequate job of conveying the ancient text to the modern reader. Nonetheless, there are some important principles that may help us to decide which translations to utilize, or perhaps to purchase.

Bible translation is difficult. The Scriptures were largely written in Hebrew and Greek (some Aramaic appears in Daniel and Ezra), so translators have the task of rendering texts into English, in our case, from languages that are quite different from ours. They strive to present the meaning of the original text in a way that is accurate and understandable to us.

It is not an option to present a completely literal rendering, because that would not truly be a translation. One example should prove this point. John 3:16, a relatively straightforward verse in Greek, would be translated word-for-word into English as follows:

Thus for loved the God the world, so that the son the one-and-only he gave, in order that every the one-believing in him not may perish, but might have life eternal.

That’s not much better than this:

Orfay odgay osay ovedlay hetay orldway . . .

All Bible translations fall somewhere on what we might call a translation continuum. On one side of the continuum are the word-for-word translations, such as the KJV/NKJV, the NASB, the ESV, and others. These translations do an excellent job of reflecting the wording of the original text (though they are not totally literal–see above), but as a result they may be more difficult to read in English and they may not flow particularly well. On the other side of the continuum are the more thought-for-thought (not a perfect characterization) translations, such as the NLT, and even further that direction, the Message, which is really a paraphrase. These translations tend to flow well in English, and they are easy to read, but they introduce a greater level of translational interpretation and bias. Somewhere between these groups of translations are the NIV and the HCSB.

Because translations have different characteristics, it is appropriate to read different translations in different situations. If one is looking to read large chunks of text, or is just beginning to become acquainted with the Bible, the thought-for-thought or “middle-sitting” translations make this easier. If one is looking to do an in-depth Bible study, the word-for-word translations are much more useful. In my opinion, the more periphrastic (thought-for-thought) a translation is, the more dangerous it can be if the reader does not recognize it as a thought-for-thought rendering.

I place a very high value on the specific words of Scripture, and I feel this is biblical (Matthew 5:18), so I would suggest that it is best for the average reader to lean more heavily in study on the word-for-word translations. I like the ESV because it is very faithful to the original wording of the texts, but it also is readable. Beside this, it deals accurately with gender language in the Scripture, which I don’t necessarily find to be the case with the 2011 update of the NIV.

One of the wonderful things about modern technology is that it has made multiple Bible versions readily accessible. Thus, you don’t have to pick one version and never consult the others. In fact, consulting multiple versions is often helpful for those who wish to drill down on a text.

What translations do you use? How have you found them to be helpful or unhelpful?

—Beau Stanley

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